Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Frustrated

Let me preface all of this with saying that I love my family, I'm grateful for them, and I know I have many blessings. But sometimes it just feels good to vent.

1 - Potty training is horrible and is ruining nap time which just creates a cycle of drama that culminates in me feeling like a failure by the end of the day.
2 - Newborns who wake up to eat then go back to sleep without much of a problem in a crib are great. Until they decide that they don't want to be put down to sleep anymore but would much rather be held. And then if you put them down they wake up really angry because they are tired and you put them down and now they are awake.
3 - Toddlers who finally figure out there is someone smaller in the house have a tendency to suddenly need mom more, want to be "up" all the time, and decide that, if that doesn't work, they'll just start hitting everyone. It's awesome.
4 - Nearly 3 months into sleep deprivation, mama's temper starts to come out more and more.
5 - Toddlers who know how to push mama's buttons tend to do so just to see the angry monster come out. As a parent, it sucks when it works and you find yourself irrationally angry at a two year old.
6 - Feelings of inadequacy suck, too. Don't even get me started on the feelings of inadequacy. I can't count how many times I have felt sorry for Alan and Soren when they've walked through the door after work/school.
7 - Being a mom is hard work. Really hard.
8 - Crying is therapeutic, but I still hate it.

I know this is just a moment in time, that it will pass. I know that in a few short years I will be longing for the time when my kids were small. But right now each day seems very long. And on days like today, I wonder how my kids will remember me. Right now I just feel like an angry, grumpy, emotional tyrant.

*sigh*

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Lots and Lots and Lots . . .

So I have a minute to breathe and update life, so here goes!

Henry is TWO months old!!! How did that happen?? Anyway, he is now starting to give us some smiles and giggles. His sleeping patterns are starting to emerge, but he also has been a pill the past few nights. We need to figure that out. And boy, oh boy, he is growing like a weed! At his 2 month appointment he was 24.5 inches long (2.5 inches longer in 6 weeks!) and nearly 10.5lbs (over 3lbs gained in 6 weeks!). He is actually heavier and longer than Soren was at 2 months. Impressive! We are loving having this little guy around - such an easy going kiddo!

Caroline has big things going on, too! We are on the potty training ride right now. I hate potty training. However, she is doing remarkably well. Today is day 5 and she has managed to take herself to the potty successfully twice without any help from mom. Well done, big girl! I'm hoping we'll keep making progress because not having to change her diapers is awesome. Other than potty training, Caroline has also discovered her little brother. She has also decided she loves him. This is fabulous for all of us!

Soren continues to amaze & impress me. He is doing very well in school, trying very hard to take the initiative with his school work & keep his grades up. This year he participated in National History Day again. For his project he created a website (last year he did an essay). He won first place at his school and 5th place in the region, missing out on going to state by one place! I was so proud of him, especially because Alan and I were so busy during the prep time for his project that we were of little help to him - he did this mainly on his own with the help of his teachers. Such a fabulous job! Soren also continues to amaze me with his musical talents. He had a jazz band concert at the beginning of February and played not only the piano, but then ran across the stage twice to play his trumpet with solos and everything. This past weekend he also performed in a duet and an ensemble for Solo and Ensemble - a state wide music event. For middle schoolers, they perform and are adjudicated. As you progress to high school, however, it becomes a judged competition with scoring and all of that. I participated in Solo and Ensemble in junior high and high school so it is fun to see Soren doing the same, even if it is for trumpet and not for voice! Soren continues to be an amazing kid, even when he acts like a teenager. Haha!

I love my kiddos and right now my life pretty much is them. I'm okay with that, though. I'm so very blessed to have the three of them in my life and even more blessed to have an amazing husband who continues to help me every single day and love me even when I'm falling apart.

Life is pretty stinkin' good right now, even with a toddler, newborn, and tweenager. It's not great at every moment, but overall I really can't complain.

And it's a good thing I'm writing this post today and not yesterday because I would have been singing a whole different song! Haha!

Videos and pictures coming very soon. However, there is a certain little guy who needs a fresh pair of pants and a little more food. :)