Thursday, May 28, 2009

It is easy to get a thousand prescriptions but hard to get one single remedy.

What a week it has been! I feel like I've moved into the doctor's office! Not really, I exaggerate. But you knew that already.

Ever since my sweet little girl entered the world . . . actually a few weeks before that . . . my body started falling apart. Rude! First it was the Choleostasis followed by the sudden jump in blood pressure and concerns of Pregnancy Induced Hypertension. Fun times! My poor blood pressure is determined not to return to normal (even though normal for me is high for most), so I'm juggling three different medications to try and control it. My liver function is better than it was but still twice as bad as the normal individual. It's coming down every month, though, so that's something. But a new development has started rearing it's ugly head. My thyroid has decided to flip out. So this week not only did I have a normal monthly doctor's visit (yep, I go every month), but I also had to do another blood draw (had one last week as well) in addition to an ultrasound of my thyroid! Ok, body! Enough of the stupid! I know this will all pass, but seriously......

This week on the way home from one of my visits to the doctor I ran into a friend (not literally) who was on a walk. I stopped and chatted with her for a minute and before I know it I'm signed up to go walking with her in the morning! We walked yesterday and today with plans to walk Monday through Friday after Soren hitches a ride to school on the bus. 2.5 miles. Mostly uphill. And when I say uphill I don't mean a super steep little hill, but rather a very long climb. Ha! It's been good, though. I enjoy her company and we push our strollers up the hill and chat about lots of different things. So great!

I'm sure there is more I should share, but I'm tired! I need a little nap before I partake in the rest of the day which includes a "Pride Night" at Soren's school where the band will be playing as well as a song practice for a piece that we (a group of ladies from church) will be performing on Sunday during church. I'd say thank goodness tomorrow is Friday, but it's going to be busy as well. And Saturday. And Sunday. I wonder what is on the calander for Monday?

Friday, May 22, 2009

Growing Up

It's interesting to me how much not only my life has changed - but how much I have personally changed in the past 6+ months. And how much everything around me is changing as well.

Oh, I'm still me. I'm still crazy and silly and a big ol' kid at heart. But for the first time in my life, I really feel like a mom. Maybe it's having two kids, maybe it's being older... I don't know. Maybe it's because I cook dinner 5 nights a week and am now baking my own bread (& grinding my own wheat). Maybe it's because we are eating things like chickpeas and fresh blanched asparagus. All I know is, I actually feel like I'm not pretending anymore - that I am a full fledged part of the "mom club." Strange.

I know I don't spend as much time on the computer anymore. Oh, it's still on - sitting there humming away. But I'm changing diapers, feeding baby girl, helping Soren with homework, cooking dinner, mashing up fun little foods to torment the princess with, cleaning up little messes, playing peek-a-boo and patty-cake... etc. The good news is that I am starting to find time for the things I used to enjoy - as a release - on the computer. That is a relief.

But, as cheesy, cliche, and silly as it may sound - nothing compares to the joy I feel in being a mother. I say that knowing that there may very well be people reading this who are currently in pursuit and/or feel as though that time may never happen for them. I say it also knowing that there are friends who have no desire to ever be a mother. We are all built different - emotionally, physically, etc. - so it is what it is. But I know that this is the job I was born to do. And, as tough as it might be on some days, there really is nothing that compares to a big hug from my boy, a huge smile from my girl, and the love that is ever present in our home. I love my babies.

On Wednesday, Soren came home from school with a packet previewing what the 5th graders will be discussing in Human, Growth, and Development (aka - Sex Education). I knew it was coming. So we sat down yesterday and had the most amazing 2 hour conversation I think we have ever had. I love that he talks to me. I love that he asks me questions. I love that I'm not too shy/embarrased to answer him. I love that we can have a dialogue that is eerily adult like and yet I can still chase him, tackle him, and tickle him later. It is strange, however, to know that my little boy is growing up so quickly. It hurts my heart a little to know that he knows all about quite a few different very grown up subjects now, but it's all part of the process of life.

Caroline continues to learn new things and gets a little bigger every day. She had her 6 month appointment earlier this week and was 15.1lbs and 27 inches long! That puts her in the 25th percentile for weight and the 90th percentile for height (surprise haha). She's starting to sit up on her own for little spurts of time, she actually plays on her tummy now (until she gets bored and then she rolls over), and she loves to talk, talk, talk! Her favorite phrase right now is 'da-da-da-da.' One of the things that she does that makes us laugh is trying to eat our faces, noses, chins, etc. I know it's something she'll grow out of before I know it, so we love it! Sometimes it is shocking to me that half a year has already passed by - some moments have gone so quickly. Other times it is a relief to know that some very difficult times seem to be behind us and, for now, we are able to enjoy her more and more each day. Three naps a day for 3 days in a row has not hurt, either.

As for me, I am slowly discovering myself again. I am starting to emerge from the post-birth 'mommy 24x7' fog. I've been able to have a girl's night again. I've been to play groups at the park. I'm starting a book club (although Alan and I may always call it The Finer Things Club. . . bwahahaha). I have wanted to be a mommy again for such a long time that I have been cherishing every second (even the crappy ones) of life with a new little baby in the house. But now it's time for me to be me again. But a newer me. A better me. A me with some more perspective on life. It's ok - I love the me I am becoming from the me I used to be. I'm ready.

One of my goals (aside from a clean kitchen sink!), is to try and journal/blog once a day at least on the weekdays. So we'll see how that progresses. I have a handful of other goals and hopefully, if naps can keep up to at least 2 a day, I can start really working towards them.

Today is a day off from school, as well as Monday, so I'm hoping Soren and I can scoot off to the library and then come home and try a new bread recipe! That should be fun because we are going to be grinding up some more grains and working with different flours - rice, oat, and buckwheat. Wish us luck!

And to end the post, I leave you with some fun pictures since I haven't shared for a while:

Baby girl, sitting in the garden box Alan built over the weekend! She loves to be outside. If she is screaming her head off (a habit that is becoming less and less frequent), we just take her outside for a few minutes and she calms right down!

Bwahahaha.... I always said I would never put huge bows on her head, but seriously? I just loved how funny it looked on her so we kept it on all day yesterday. Also, whenever I use the flash, she goes cross eyed. It's pretty funny. But hey, she's cute!

Soren wanted to jump in the box, too! Actually, we made him go in and then plopped Caroline in his arms - which he rarely says no to! Cute kiddos!

Here she is, sitting up! We call that toy her 'sitting up' toy. I usually only let her play with it if she is practicing sitting up! She's getting better, little by little. I'm enjoying the fact that she's not mobile quite yet, though.

Ok, that's all for now! I'm off to chill with my boy!

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Homemade Love From Nae

OK! So this is how this works...The first five people to respond to this post will receive something made by me for you. My choice made especially for you. Of course there are some restrictions and limitations:~

1. I make no guarantees that you will like what I make! (Of course, I will try to make something that I think you would like.)
2. What I create will be just for you.
3 It will be done sometime this year.
4. You have no clue what it will be... it may be a story. It may be poetry or an article on properly cleaning your face before a masque. I may draw or paint something. I may bake something and mail it to you. Who knows? Not you, that's for sure. ;-)
5. I reserve the right to do something extremely strange.
6. I will send it anywhere! It doesn't matter where you live!

Yay - it gives me something to do!

That's all for now - more later!

Friday, May 8, 2009

You know you're a mom when....

You come home feeling proud of yourself for saving a ton of money at the grocery store! I went shopping today to pick up a few things for our Mother's Day dinner on Sunday and about died! I saved over $60!!! Go me!! And I was even at Safeway - and I don't shop there that often because the prices are usually crazy, but when they have sales... wowsa!!!

So check this out - 20lbs of RIBS (yum!) for.... $13. You read that right! They were on sale AND the check out lady scanned $13 worth of coupons for me! Plus I got some V8 Fusion (YUM!) for $1.49 (with coupon). But my favorite deal? 3lbs of strawberries for the price of 1lb! Score! They were buy one, get one free and then I had a free lb of strawberries coupon!

In other news, I am going to make my yummy bread again either tonight or tomorrow. I think I shall take a picture this time and show off my creation! I am also contemplating purchasing raw milk instead of regular ol' supermarket milk. The FDA is trying to scare me out of it though.... cuz there have been 800 whole reported cases of E.coli in the past 9 years that have been traced back to raw milk. But seriously? I'm tired of the over-processed American diet. Let's get back to basics, peeps!

Also - I love Netflix. I love that I can watch stuff on my computer. It's super dooper nifty neato!

Have I blabbed enough?

Oh, and another thing? I have the best job in the world. I sure love my kids - even when they drive me crazy. Being a mom rocks. Being a mom that gets to stay home with her kids rocks even more!

Ok, time to figure out what to feed the masses. I was supposed to crock pot today but I FORGOT because I was in the middle of playing Mario Kart. I am seriously addicted. I only have 2 more characters and one more vehicle to open. I just want to beat the game so I can stop obsessing! If Caroline slept longer, I'd be done already....


Have a great weekend! And, in case I don't post again - Happy Mother's Day to all the wonderful women of the world!!!!

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Who needs sleep?

Sleep is for the weak, right?

I guess I'm week... I really miss my sleep! Caroline has decided that she really is done with sleeping through the night, which is upsetting for all of us. It's a good thing that I love her so much that I'm willing to sacrifice hours upon hours of sleep for her!

The good news, though, is that Monday she sat up on her own for the first time! She's not very stable at all, but I managed to get a picture or two of her new 'skill.'

So yay for Caroline! Now if we could just work on the sleep thing.....

In other news, I've been experimenting in the kitchen! Maybe when I think about it, I will start taking pictures of some of these experiments. I made some bread last week that was delicious and totally nutritious at the same time! I've been grinding my own wheat and yesterday I made chicken rolls with whole wheat crescent rolls that I made all by my lonesome! I was pretty amazed at myself, even if they didn't taste 100% like I wanted them to - it was a start, though.

Also, yesterday I had a free lunch at KFC and about died when I saw the ingredients on the back of the Honey Spread they offer their victims:

High Fructose Corn Syrup (don't believe the commercials, it's all lies)
Corn Syrup
Caramel Color
Natural Flavors
(11% Honey)

I'd rather just have regular honey, please.

Well, I had more to ramble about, but it's time to take Soren to scouts and get dinner rolling. More later.

Friday, May 1, 2009

I would be remiss if I did not put in a little plug about what this week is:

Although we've been blessed with two wonderful children, that does not change the fact that we've dealt with (and will most likely continue to deal with) infertility for most of our married life.

Infertility is a real medical condition. It effects a couple physically, emotionally, and spiritually. There are rarely any quick and easy fixes for infertility. And even if you are one of the lucky ones who are able to get pregnant and even have a successful pregnancy, infertility doesn't go away. It's still there. So while I may be sitting next to the most beautiful baby girl in the entire world (what? it's true! hehe), I still vividly remember the longing for another child. Why so vividly? Because it's already returned! And we already know it will be an uphill battle to expand our family any further.

If you know anyone who is suffering from infertility, please choose your words carefully. It's a fine balance between saying enough about your life to remain involved with your friend and saying too much. You know your friend better than I do. Be sensitive, but more importantly - be as informed as you can. And, for the love of all things, don't say anything as stupid as - "Just relax," "Take a vacation," or "why don't you 'just' adopt." Please. Be smarter than that.

You can learn more about infertility here.

And be grateful for any little terrors you have running around.

Oh - and here is a bonus picture for listening to me yammer: